We are on Day 12 of symptoms now for hubs and I. The kids got over it quickly, but things got worse for us after I last posted on Day 6. Symptoms morphed from sore throats, headaches, congestion to losing our smell and taste, fatigue, brain fog, lightheadedness.
It’s hard to explain and like nothing I’ve ever felt. Hubs and I both agree we’ve never been so sick for such an extended period of time. We still feel fortunate it’s been this mild, but it’s been a scary and humbling week.
I wouldn’t say I ever felt like I could not breathe (and we have an oximeter to ensure we are getting enough oxygen), but I would get lightheaded and feel like I needed to rest after talking animatedly at all, or reading a story out loud to my little boy.
Of course we started researching a little more about what to expect, how long symptoms will last. It seems around Day 10 people either start to feel better, or get worse and end up in the hospital. So the past few days have been full of anxiety. Adding to that, a close friend of mine lost an otherwise healthy family member in her 60’s to covid, suddenly, two days ago. And a 41 year old, otherwise healthy, politician just died of it too. It could have been us. There is nothing that sets us apart. They have no idea why this virus kills some and others aren’t affected at all.
Also my sister has been allowing another, untrustworthy, adult to come into the house she shares with my mother… right when there’s a new more contagious strain going around.
I cried a lot yesterday. Today is just beginning but I want to say with cautious optimism we are starting to feel better. What else can I do but take care of myself so I can be better prepared for whatever comes next? I’m ashamed to say even a couple days ago I had a fantasy we’d be feeling better by tonight and having a small celebratory drink. I know it’s a terrible idea and I’m not going to do it, but there’s such a strong desire to feel some sort of normalcy and escape all that’s been happening for the past 2 weeks, for the past fucking 9 1/2 months.
I know turning a page on the calendar doesn’t really change anything, but it gives me a feeling of hope nonetheless. A sober cheers to everyone’s health in 2021.