The Deals We Make With Ourselves About Alcohol

Yesterday was a normal day, all the kids home, somehow feeling so busy even though we didn’t go anywhere. It’s a funny thing with this pandemic, I thought we would have SO much more time, but it feels like all I can do to keep caught up on the dishes some days.

The whole day I was looking forward to getting together with my girlfriends after dinner. This is a close group, stay at home mom friends I have spent countless hours with hanging out at the park with our kids. Except this year no kids, just us six feet apart. I am so grateful to have them, but the loss of our very social party in the park type of summer is one of the biggest bummers of the pandemic.

Anyway I was also feeling grateful that it’s the kind of gathering where drinking isn’t a thing. We are very comfortable together and out of 5 people only a couple of us would care to bring alcohol anyway. But still, right before I left, I thought…. maybe I’ll bring a beer just in case.

“Don’t do it, you’ll feel like crap if you start drinking this early.”

“If you abstain until you get home, maybe it’s justified to have a drink after the kids go to bed.”

“Hubs is very stressed with work today, you know he’ll want to have some beer later.”

“You didn’t drink hard alcohol all weekend, there is still that half bottle of bourbon.”

After the kids were sleeping and I got the kitchen all clean, I happily poured myself a glass of bourbon, figuring there was not much time to drink much before bed so I’d feel fine tomorrow.

And I do feel mostly fine, except for a very vague headache. But that wasn’t a guarantee, and I did stay up later than I would have otherwise. Because of course I had another glass, which is probably 4 units total because my pours are so strong.

The bourbon was a gift given to me last Sunday and is half gone already. I learned a long time ago it is dangerous for me to keep bottles of booze in the house.

So the deal I made with myself is that I would only buy in half pint quantities, and that’s what I did for a very long time. A half pint is technically 4 units, but more like 2 strong drinks for me. Of course when I finished that I would start sipping on beer… enough to make me feel regretful in the morning.

Tell me, what are some deals you have tried to make with yourself about alcohol?

3 thoughts on “The Deals We Make With Ourselves About Alcohol

  1. On a Sunday, I’m not drinking for the week. Then Monday .. just tonight and then nothing. Tuesday, wed and so on …

    I’ll run first then I can have just one

    I’ll start early then I can stop early and get a good nights sleep

    Loads. Tons. It ruled my life.

    Now I don’t need deals anymore.


    Liked by 1 person

  2. I’ll just have a few. Same lie to myself everytime. But after I have a few I literally have a physical ache for more. And if for some other reason I cannot drink more, like it is impossible to get more I will crack the shits something fierce.
    It’s so much effort, trying to convince yourself you will be good this time, trying to make sure there is enough, trying to be subtle about it. Too much effort. And never as much fun as I thought. And always a bad idea the next day …

    Liked by 1 person

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